[Iggy doesn't know what Sully's doing to him back there, but he knows it's not natural. He feels a moment of disassociation so strong that he wonders if he's about to actually leave his body, to just exist outside of it and watch as he's fucked and... whatever else is happening to him.
Instead he makes soft gasping noises as he's rocked back and forth, grip on the railing relaxing, tightening, relaxing, tightening.]
Ah. I. Yes.
[Such is his shame at this admission that Iggy has to close his eyes while he makes it. But he cannot lie, not split open like this. (Oh, it's metaphorical, surely only that, surely the white knobs of his spine aren't on display, shining wetly like trumpery jewels.]
I ran. I'll run again, I think. When they don't need me anymore.
[Except he can't run here, he realises quite suddenly. He's spent months not quite mocking people who want to leave, wondering who would give up an easy life. But what will he do when he can't stand it anymore? When he's been here a year? Two years? Still haunted, still lonely.
Panic sets his heart beating too fast and he shifts, not quite pulling away.]
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Instead he makes soft gasping noises as he's rocked back and forth, grip on the railing relaxing, tightening, relaxing, tightening.]
Ah. I. Yes.
[Such is his shame at this admission that Iggy has to close his eyes while he makes it. But he cannot lie, not split open like this. (Oh, it's metaphorical, surely only that, surely the white knobs of his spine aren't on display, shining wetly like trumpery jewels.]
I ran. I'll run again, I think. When they don't need me anymore.
[Except he can't run here, he realises quite suddenly. He's spent months not quite mocking people who want to leave, wondering who would give up an easy life. But what will he do when he can't stand it anymore? When he's been here a year? Two years? Still haunted, still lonely.
Panic sets his heart beating too fast and he shifts, not quite pulling away.]