1. he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
2. i don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
3. there's no food at the bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread!
4. either this place is haunted or i'm far more drunk than i thought.
5. i've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.