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π–˜π–†π–‘π–™π–‡π–šπ–—π–“π–™ π–’π–”π–‰π–˜. ([personal profile] saltburntmods) wrote in [community profile] draino2025-01-04 08:00 am
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π“π‡πˆπ’ πˆπ’ 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐈 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 β–£ JAN TDM





JANUARY 2025 TDM: IMMORTALITY


Welcome to SALTBURNT, a panfandom smut/thriller game based off the film Saltburn, where characters are encouraged to indulge their deepest desires. The money never runs out and the liquor never stops pouring, so you may as well indulge from the bounty. Of course, things are rarely what they seem, and the manor itself seems to have a consciousness of its own. Throw parties, trash the house, engage in youthful merriment, but remember β€” dangers come out at night, and no one, no matter how rich you are, is safe from demons lurking in the shadows.

Threads can be considered game canon, provided the players agree. Players can also start fresh upon acceptance into the game. In game characters can post to the TDM directly, using Β« NEW CHARACTER/IN GAMEΒ» in the header. There will be a spot below for new characters to link their toplevels for easy access. Alternatively, prompts on the Test Drive can be used for in game logs.







WELCOME TO SALTBURNT


It's the hangover more than the light streaming in through half drawn curtains that wakes you up, your brain rattling in your skull, your mouth dry and cottony, your stomach churning with whatever it is you drank last night. If self preservation is your strong suit, you might turn over in bed and see a few painkillers laid out for you on a silver dish, accompanied by a glass of water. If it isn’t, stay in bed and wallow β€” eventually a maid will be in to tear your curtains open, saying, "Breakfast is served," and scurrying out quietly, invisibly. Breakfast? Maybe it’s normal for you. Maybe it isn’t.

You're drawn from the room, either by the mystery, or an undefinable urge that could be supernatural in origin, or could be your hunger catching up to you. It's almost nostalgic, the walk to the dining room β€” have you been here before? Were you drawn up to this estate in a car? Haven’t you done all this already? Maybe you mosey around a library, maybe you run into your suite mate in your adjoining bathroom. Regardless, seemingly all hallways, covered in priceless artworks and ancient relics from times long past, lead to the dining room, where a comically long table houses the Balfours and their many guests, some who seem just as disgruntled and confused as you. No matter. "Breakfast will be out in a minute," they say. What's that?

EDIT SEPTEMBER 2024: For those who have attended breakfast with the Balfours before, a change in routine might come as a shock, given how rarely they stray from form. However, as of September, the menu has been redone by some guests in the manor. In place of the self-serve style breakfast, there is an elevated menu, including: a self-serve juice bar, with pitchers of various juiced fruit and vegetables, shaved ice, coconut water, green and black tea syrups, potted microherbs, sliced whole berries, and finger limes. There is also, naturally, liquor and champagne available. Guests can make their own drinks, or ask the allocated staff member to serve them one of the "specials" if they're feeling adventurous.

That said, these are world class chefs, so the gold is really in the menu:
THE EGGS

𝐓𝐇𝐄 π‰πŽππ“π˜: one runny boiled egg shelled and recoated in edible gold leaf, seated on a throne of fried bread soldiers, plated with whipped butter and italian parsley.
𝐄𝐆𝐆𝐒 ππ„ππ„πƒπˆπ‚π“: vinegar poached eggs with hollandaise foam on a bed of toasted freekah and baby spinach.
𝐄𝐆𝐆𝐒 π’π‡π€πŠπ€π’π‡πŽπ”πŠπ€: two eggs poached in a ramekin of pureed tomato, served with a crispy grilled cheese cut to dip.
𝐓𝐇𝐄 π’π˜πƒππ„π˜: french omelette with a light cheese filling, topped with crushed potato chips and chives.
πŽπ„π”π…π’ ππ‘πŽπ”πˆπ‹π‹π„π’: fluffy scrambled eggs in brown butter, served on sourdough.
π’ππ€ππˆπ’π‡ 𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓: mini-quiche made with caramelized red onions and jamon pata negra ham.
𝐄𝐆𝐆 πŒπ‚π’π€ππƒπ–πˆπ‚π‡: bacon, egg, cheese and sausage breakfast muffin that tastes weirdly like it was made at a popular chain with golden arches.

THE SWEETS

❖ momofuku's "cereal milk" ❖
❖ fette biscottate with a sour cherry jam and peanut floss ❖
❖ a warm cinnamon bun served with a shot of espresso coffee for dipping ❖
❖ a macadamia-marzipan croissant with a wattleseed and burnt-honey filling ❖
❖ poffertjes with a liquid nutella injection ❖


If you want to leave, you’ll have to tell Giles, the housekeeper, who will arrange a car for you that mysteriously, or perhaps suspiciously, never arrives. Unfortunately, confronting Giles about it is near impossible, as he’s as good at being invisible as the rest of the house staff. Of course, there’s no reason why you can’t just walk out. The front gates are easy enough to jump over, even if the walk towards them gives you a strange sense of foreboding, or just outright discomfort, as if the ground itself doesn’t want you to leave. Those more sensitive or fragile might find they can’t make the jump, no matter how physically able, or desperately wanting. Still, a strong person could continue on, over the fence and into the lush English countryside. The feeling doesn’t dissipate, though β€” this sense of wrongness, almost sickness, like a weight on your back. Walk into the evergreen, carry on, but the strongest will make it perhaps a mile or so before the weight of dread and paranoia brings you to your knees, and then to your face, flat in the middle of a dirt road. What were you thinking? Is this really better?

Wake up with a hangover, in a bed, the curtains drawn, the maid saying, "Breakfast is served," before scurrying out. The painkillers are there, just like you remember. In fact, it’s all exactly how you remember, as if you never left an imprint the first time, or any mess you made was cleared away while your back was turned. Walk to the dining room, find everyone there eating away at their breakfast.

"We dress for dinner," says Portia, with a kind, if discerning smile. "Black tie."




8-BALL

CONTENT WARNINGS: drugs, nsfw.

In all 700 (and change!) years of Saltburnt's existence, never has the new year been rung in with anything less than a bang. Similarly, the manor is a bustle of activity in the post-Christmas week, setting up predominately in and around the Operating Theatre. Formally, all guests are welcomed to celebrate on the 31st of December leading into the new year by a fancy, handwritten invitation, delivered individually by Giles. BLACK TIE, the invite says. LET'S MAKE IT A GOOD YEAR, DAWG.

Upon arrival, it's plain to see the Operating Theatre has gotten a glow up since last visited. The amphitheater stairs serve as a dramatic entrance to walk through, the main floor usually designed for holding cadavers for dissection instead replaced with a dance floor. Everything is black, white, and as silver as surgery tools, the room seemingly a great deal larger than when it was last observed β€”Β though, maybe that's your eyes playing tricks on you. Don't worry about it!

Celebrate instead, ringing in the new year with loud, Eurodance music and American rock, bodies dancing together for one last hurrah of 2006. In true Saltburnt fashion, there's a snack spread on the organized operating tables β€”Β Vietnamese spring rolls, glass noodles, Prosecco jello shots to go with the tall flutes of champagne passed around on silver plates. Additionally, there are some silver platters circling the venue full of tall mounds of white, powdery cocaine, already spliced into lines for convenience. The name of the game is indulgence, as ever, getting one's worst habits out of the way to make room for better, healthier choices in the new year.

For the last hour of the year, a mock time ball in the shape of an magic 8-ball is set up in the center of the room, slowly inching up as time ticks down. At 11:59, the ball reaches its zenith, much more rapidly moving the other way as the countdown starts. Once the countdown drops to the 10s, everyone in the room is pairing up in couples (or trios?) to kiss at the strike of midnight, loudly chanting the last five numbers in chanting succession, 3, 2, 1, and happy new year!

Several things happen at once, following your kiss, or the strike of midnight if you're more of a lone wolf. Firstly, everyone's clothes disappear, left completely naked in the theatre. Any fabric they might think to dress themselves in will miraculously disappear once they put it on, and any attempts to escape the room are likewise barred, doors unopenable for the time being. At the same time, the 8-ball which reached the bottom of its stand rolls over, presenting its windowed side to all who look upon it β€”Β and all who look upon it will see one of 20 different instructions.

For a fun game, roll a d20 and see what you get!



































Naturally, the doors only permit you to leave after achieving whatever challenge the 8-ball gave you, where you can run nakedly back to your room and find some clothes, saying goodnight to a wonderful year. Any and all party poopers uninterested in taking part will be let go an hour or so post midnight β€”Β approximately when it stops being funny.






NEW YEAR, NEW ME


CONTENT WARNINGS: homophobia, misogyny, implied grooming, cultural insensitivity.

New year is a time for new beginnings, and it's no surprise that many resolutions involve the bettering of one's self. Exercise and eating healthy are all usual suspects, but what if you could take a little something that did it all for you, effort-free? New Years Resolutions the easy way β€”Β try ReSculpt, an organic supplement using exotic kinds of sea kelp, as provided by Portia's personal life coach SHAMAN LEAF, for making a better you. Fat melts away and wrinkles smooth out, complexions clear and muscles strengthen, all with the help of this miraculous product! Simply apply the topical ointment on yourself, and watch a new and improved you emerge β€” even those of you who wouldn't choose it willingly can take part, as it's stocked in every bathroom, in the shape of an ordinary lotion bottle.

Of course, it doesn't only effect your looks. The road to a better you requires a full makeover, changing you from the inside out. Be the son your father always wanted, or the wife your husband deserves β€” become a better partner, a better housewife, a better soldier, a better friend. Whatever any of that means to you, whether changing your style or the people you're attracted to, this magical lotion seems to clear it up and straighten you out, turn you into a true, decent member of polite upperclass society. Even Portia in the days following New Years appears younger, nearly like a girl in her teens thanks to the power of ReSculpt. On your journey to self-improvement, you might feel inclined to sign up for Shaman Leaf's 12-step guide to proper English behaviors, including lessons in etiquette, fine dining, lovemaking with respectful hands-on accompaniment, and a suggested sizable donation on towards Shaman Leaf's travel fund. All of it concludes in a graduation for the enlistees in the form of a debutante ball.

Not to worry if you didn't take the course β€” all are welcome to witness the caterpillar become the butterfly in this re-introduction to society in one of Saltburnt's many exemplary ballrooms. As opposed to the more carefree party that welcomed in the year, the debutante ball is steeped in the premeditated societal structures of an aristocratic family, everything proper and regal by design, complete with huge, expensive dresses and expertly tailored, starch-collared suits. Luckily, ReSculpt will see to everyone conforming to the expectations of society, without complaint. Unluckily, the side effects seem to kick in at the debutante ball.

Step one: paranoia. Is this who you really are? What happened to the person you were a few days ago? Where did everything that made you who you are go? Dread creeps in, a discordant note, a cold breeze. Step two: touch repulsion. The dances at the ball are all respectful, leaving plenty of room for Jesus, flirty little wrist touches and soft, careful hands β€” and you're disgusted by wanting more, confused by it. Consumed by it? Scared of it. The sick touch of skin on skin is as offensive as it is arousing, like gripping ice cubes in your hand and flinching at the numbing, burning pain. Step three: hallucinations. You turn in a dance and the hand that slips into yours is more bone than flesh. The ballroom itself seems to grow more decayed than decadent, ghosts and horrifying faces spliced between the crowd, all looking at you, angry and disturbed. Is that face looking back at you your own? Can your friends tell you from a doppelgΓ€nger? Who even are you anymore?

And finally, step four: rehab. As it turns out, Shaman Leaf is not actually a good guy. That is, he's not a guy at all but a pΓΊca, here to unleash a humble amount of chaos and then quickly skedaddle while the iron's still hot, escaping with mischievous shapeshifting behaviors through the closest door, galloping to the forest. Though his exit from the premises doesn't clear up the effects of ReSculpt, it's nothing a little week spent very fashionably in rehab can't clear up. Going cold turkey is the only way to remove it from your system β€” and you do want to remove it from your system. A depleting supply will force you into withdrawals regardless, in the form of continued paranoia and hallucinations, acting hot and cold with touch, alternating between your true self and ReSculpt self, fevers, nosebleeds, puking, and blacking out. A good detox for the new year.



DIRECTORY


agoniser: (pic#17515516)

8ball aka two haters that don't know shit

[personal profile] agoniser 2025-01-05 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
[ When it comes to the parties and other odd customs that this estate is so fond of, Marazhai rarely refuse them. First and foremost, it feels like a way to gather information, however slight it may be, because he’s behaving here, but he’s still brutally cutthroat. The moment an opportunity for escape presented itself, he’d use everything he learned against anyone else. Et cetera. But secondarily and much more secretly? He has to admit. He’s often curious.

He stands out in the crowd as he always does, since he has more than a foot over very nearly everyone here, but it does at least let him see the people that gather. There are familiar faces, but there are also new ones now, and as he sees a sharp-earned woman who is dressed in a way that he thinks of as quite sensible? Well, that’s more curious than anything else, as it turns out.

Yet as he approaches, the mood of the crowd shifts to look at the 8-ball reverently, and Marazhai’s expression twists up into confusion. ]


Nor am I. It is another mon-k— [ He stops himself, huffs out a sound of annoyance, and corrects himself begrudgingly. ]human frivolity. Their customs are absurd and full of such nonsense.

[ It’s almost pleasing that she doesn’t know either… ]
tortured: (12)

it's always two dumb non-humans telling each other exactlyyyy

[personal profile] tortured 2025-01-06 07:46 am (UTC)(link)
The humans are foolish and superstitious.

[ Minthara agrees immediately, something around the eyes expressing a very particular kind of pleasure β€” it's rare, in the overworld, and especially here, to meet others equally scornful. It helps that Marazhai looks more like a drow than anybody else she's met here. ]

However.

[ Ugh. Caveats. ]

They outnumber us. It may be unwise to anger them, should this be more than frivolity.

[ If she had a blade she might consider herself capable of standing against the entire party, but without it she imagines she would soon be swarmed. Her pride is not so unbending that she cannot acknowledge that she is very much a stranger in a strange land right now. ]
agoniser: (pic#17521223)

[personal profile] agoniser 2025-01-06 06:34 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Marazhai is just as surprised that she agrees, since even if he’s met a few other non-humans at this point, they didn’t exactly share his point of view on things. That is, that they’re inferior, essentially. Truly, it’s a mystery why people don’t seem to be on board with that one… So, he laughs, but it’s clearly in agreement even if it’s sharp. ]

So indeed. It is an inconvenient thing about the estate and its… preferences. Or perhaps largely selecting weaker prey is more convenient.

[ Which, in a way, he’s probably correct. Technically. Since if there was an estate filled with Drow and/or Drukhari, it would devolve into honestly impressive amounts of bloodshed so quickly. It’s also why it’s easy for Marazhai to ignore the way the crowd is getting excited as the clock ticks over for one minute remaining, since finding a bit of a kindred spirit is far, far more interesting than celebrating a new year. ]

But clearly, that does not apply to you. [ He nods to her bracers approvingly, perhaps even minutely jealous, but that’s just his personal grievances with the library (correctly) not giving him anything he wants. ] I have reached the same conclusion, dull as it may be.
tortured: (14)

[personal profile] tortured 2025-01-07 07:13 pm (UTC)(link)
[ That he is impressed by her is only natural, of course. She touches her bracers; she had found very little of her full armour in her closet, which had been brimming with overworld clothes. Having even a little protection is good, but it is not enough. ]

I'm so glad you agree.

[ And with that he's her designated midnight kiss, so she steps closer with intent, and hooks her fingers into whatever they've managed to get Marazhai to wear. Her mouth is an unimpressed line, though he's handsome enough, and seems to understand his place better than most of the men she's met here so far.

But there's very little time for her regard. Around them, humans are starting to chant out the count-down, though they at least seem excited rather than ominous. She meets Marazhai's eyes steadily, an unspoken alliance: ready?
]
agoniser: (pic#17552663)

[personal profile] agoniser 2025-01-11 10:50 pm (UTC)(link)
[ As Minthara steps closer, his brow quirks a bit, since the motions of this aren’t immediately obvious to him. Kissing isn’t exactly part of Drukhari culture in any way, so the lead-up is a bit obscure to him, at least until she grabs his shirt. Unfortunately, his preferred fashion isn’t considered β€œblack tie”, so the convenient straps for grabbing are left behind, but a tight sweater balls into a fist decently all the same.

…That part is good, and he doesn’t seem offended or pull away from his touch. But as the implication dawns on him, her expression ends up mirrored as his smile sets into a line too. ]


Oh, do not tell me— [ Five, the crowd chants, and he makes a sound that sounds like an animal’s hiss. ] This ritual involves kissing?
tortured: (04)

[personal profile] tortured 2025-01-13 02:32 pm (UTC)(link)
[ Pair off, and kiss, is what she had been told; her partner is hopefully finding someone else with which to do this ritual, as she has chosen for herself, as is her right. ]

Do not shame me.

[ If he pulls away now, she's going to break one of those crystal wine glasses and bury the shards in his skin. Though it's not as though kissing is the good end, here; Minthara has forgotten to warn him that she habitually dresses her lips with venom. Well, with any luck it won't be enough to sicken him.

There is no further time for words. The ball drops, and Minthara will do what she must to remove any last height between them, dragging his over-tall frame downwards so they can kiss. Despite her annoyance, it's more than just a dutiful press, lips soft as a lover's as she takes his mouth for her own.

And then his clothes disappear so she has no more grip on him at all, which is exactly the kind of misfortune she was hoping to avoid, damn these Balfours.
]
agoniser: (pic#17525313)

[personal profile] agoniser 2025-01-15 03:36 am (UTC)(link)
[ Marazhai’s scowl stays firmly in place, but the firmness of her tone does give him just enough pause. It’s familiar, and though he’s compared the elves he’s met to the Eldar (all inferior, obviously), Minthara is the first one that actually immediately reminds him of his own kin. All the rest have been so sickeningly polite that the threat in her tone clearly stands out.

It also means that it isn’t all that hard to drag him down to her heightβ€”half because she’s stronger herself and half because he’s interested enough to allow itβ€”and the touch of their lips is a surprise. For one, there’s the softness of it, which he honestly just didn’t expect, considering her tone. He expected a firm, obligatory thing, perhaps teeth and blood, but there’s still a bite all the same. It’s none that he would be familiar with, but he still knows the unique feeling of poison well. Both of their people become acclimated to its bite as a rote part of their lives. He puts a hand on her shoulder tightly then as a warning, maybe a threat.

So, it’s surely ironic that it’s not that but the kiss itself that makes him tense. The venom is welcome compared to any show of tenderness and intimacy. At least if he was poisoned, he would not have such trifles to care about. His turquoise eyes are bright and full of fire, like he’s considering taking one of those wine glasses to do the same, but also… Intrigued.

And yet. The sharp and sudden mix of feeling and reaction both deflates just as quickly. The strong (and rather pleasant) grip is gone, and the chill of air hits his skin. That gets him to hiss and pull back just enough to see that… everyone is in this situation. The spark of adrenaline at being caught unaware turns to annoyance instead. ]


Typical…

[ He growls it out as he straightens, but it’s clearly not at her, considering he licks his lips lightly. He’s trying to figure out that venom, but it’ll remain beyond him. The sudden nudity clearly doesn’t bother him, since he doesn’t react with any shame or distaste, even as his many, many piercings are suddenly on display. ]

These mon-keigh are so simple that I do not know why I expected differently.