𝐓𝐄𝐗𝐓𝐒 𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓

[pronounce]

what a month! this is texts from last night.
(meme threads aren't game canon, but they're not not game canon either, right)

Comments

[kobes]

Am I? I don't feel cute. I feel tired, mostly.

Not just random people, but. It's important to have some level of self-defense.
Sometimes. Sometimes nothing can clear it, and I just have to sort of deal.

[dead_tongue]

you are. I just want to hug you and protect you always. (emotionally.)

that's what a pretty blonde told me but I was worried she was also trying to kill me at the time.
I used to go home at 4am sometimes and it was so quiet that it really did seem to help. just being alive and alone and silent.

[kobes]

Oh. Thank you. That's a nice thing to say. 😊

This month really did a number on us, didn't it? All that fighting and suspicion and everything.
That's it exactly. I'm not used to being alone like that. I mean

Alone and not scared.

[dead_tongue]

I mean it.

yeah. I'm still kinda like half worried I'm gonna get stabbed.

yeah. I get that. it's nice, right? not being afraid.

[kobes]

I know you do, that's what's so nice.

Me too. I don't think this place has ever really been SAFE but it was never so obviously dangerous before.

I mean, I'm always a little afraid. I don't think that part of me is capable of being turned off.

[dead_tongue]

bit on the other hand, people were under the influence of the house so... they're not inherently bad.

because of how you grew up?

[kobes]

Not all of them. Some people killed just because they could.

I don't know. Maybe? Does that make that much of a difference? I grew up normally.

[dead_tongue]

ok but only like, what, one person?

a traumatic childhood tends to stick with people. and what we think is 'normal' often really isn't.

[kobes]

That's one too many, in my opinion.

Well, of course. If your village is burned or your family killed by pirates or something, that makes sense.

[dead_tongue]

well yeah, but it's better than half a dozen.

it can be less dramatic than that. being overly disciplined. being alone. being suppressed. these things leave impressions on us.

[kobes]

I suppose, if we're comparing it to that. I'm more worried about people holding grudges, now that the game's over.

I guess that makes sense? I've always thought I just needed to be stronger and learn to get over it.

[dead_tongue]

I'm actually really worried about that, too.

no. that's a like, toxic cultural myth. and anybody who says that is probably deeply hurt and refusing to acknowledge it tbh.

I think you're very strong.

[kobes]

Who, specifically? If you don't mind my asking.

Oh. I mean, it was Alvida, so. I think it was just out of annoyance.

Really? Why?

[dead_tongue]

god, I dunno, everyone? people were really pissed. are you worried about someone in particular?
I am also kinda worried that I lack any survival instinct. I trusted a lot of wolves.

oh. that's like, a thing?

look at you! you've presented your authentic self to the world! that's tough to do.

[kobes]

I mean. Danny. Do you know him?
Well, so did I. I think most of them were compelled, so that makes it...sort of better?

What's a thing?

Is it? I just
Sort of felt like I didn't have any other choice.

[dead_tongue]

kind of. uhm. he says he knew a different version of me. he was really nice to me. Jem, too. so I just don't know what to think.
yeah maybe.

Alvida?

I still think it's very brave, Koby.

[kobes]

Well. He was nice to me too. Sort of. He was very complimentary.
He could maybe be both. Nice and terrible. Nice and a monster.

Oh. Yeah. I forget how much I've told you about her. I talk about her too much.

Well
Thank you, then.

[dead_tongue]

probably thinks you're hot.
yeah. that's possible, right?

it's ok! a lot has happened.

you're welcome. 💕