fuck marry kill

[money]

FUCK, MARRY, KILL

welcome to GAME NIGHT at DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES. the game on the docket? FUCK, MARRY, KILL. the rules are simple: roll the game picker wheel three times or just pick three as you'd like, dropping the names in your header comment — icly we'll say they picked they names out of a hat. people respond, comment around, get into fist fights, kiss a little? thread hop and react as you see fit!
(meme threads can be considered canon!)

Comments

Peony | Original

[hislittleflower]

Hap, August, Sapphira.

None of these sound like real names, let alone real people.

[cholesterol]

I'd say, Sapphira. She must be new. But, it's Hap. So, shaft Hap. I guess sleep with Sapphira because I don't know her and marry August. Makes a mean magic drink.

[hislittleflower]

Who is Hap and what did they do to earn your ire?

[cholesterol]

Right, you were dead for werewolf. He's not a good guy. Real asshat of a scientist. Kidnapped. Tortured.

[hislittleflower]

Yes. Thank you for the reminder of the unpleasantness I was attempting to gloss over.

Are any men 'Good Guys'?

[cholesterol]

Sorry, but, been there. A lot. So. You move on.

Maybe, maybe not. Some are better than others, maybe.

[hislittleflower]

As I have I. It doesn't get any more pleasant with frequency.

I doubt that. Respectfully. I wouldn't trust a man as far as I could throw him. And as you know that would be at best a few inches.

[cholesterol]

You never forget your first, though.

So, noted.

[hislittleflower]

Death, or....?

[cholesterol]

Death, Peony.

[hislittleflower]

Oh.

I mostly try to forget.

[cholesterol]

Not something you can.

[hislittleflower]

You'd be surprised at what I am able to make myself wilfully forget.

Stubbornness is a useful tool when handled by a practiced user.

[retrogressive]

I accept your proposal!

[cholesterol]

Uhh, let me guess. Sapphira?

[retrogressive]

Hello, Dean! I noticed that many people want to kill you. Are you okay?

[cholesterol]

Hey, Sapphira. Welcome to the party.

I don't take a game like this seriously.

...They do?

[retrogressive]

Thank you! Everyone here has been so warm and open. I don't immediately see why you were chosen to die so many times. You're not ugly to me.

[cholesterol]

Because the game's a popularity context. At least the president killed me with respect.

( That's something.

He picks the hat back up and holds it out. )

Your turn.

[maoa]

Kill Hap. Sapphira’s pretty hot but I’d take her out first.

Marry August. [ sort of mumbled into her drink before she downs the rest of it. ]