fuck marry kill

[money]

FUCK, MARRY, KILL

welcome to GAME NIGHT at DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES. the game on the docket? FUCK, MARRY, KILL. the rules are simple: roll the game picker wheel three times or just pick three as you'd like, dropping the names in your header comment — icly we'll say they picked they names out of a hat. people respond, comment around, get into fist fights, kiss a little? thread hop and react as you see fit!
(meme threads can be considered canon!)

Comments

[dead_tongue]

No, sadly. But you can't miss him - he's built like a Mack truck and about as friendly.

[unfazeable]

You make it sound like he ran you over in the dirt, and you'd still let him flog your little phone for money.

[dead_tongue]

We haven't actually spoken much. But his vibe is cool.

[unfazeable]

Appreciate that. This place seems all about vibes. Most of them aren't cool.

Ava, by the way.

[dead_tongue]

Iggy. This is a great way to get to know people, huh?

[unfazeable]

It is, actually. I can see what I've been missing out all this time.

How long have you been here? Bit overwhelming, to hear about every elaborate polycule and I suppose a lot of people have died and come straight back. Or something.

[dead_tongue]

And see who's fighting.

Oh, wow, uh... just over a year. I do not have an elaborate polycule myself but I understand that it looks like everyone else does, and my own shit is just sorta weird.

Yeah, the dying thing sucks. I've died twice. Murdered last time!

[unfazeable]

Are you fucking serious? You look—

[alive? healthy? a lovely queer man in the lap of luxury? the gesture approximates flattering, anyway.]

Weird how, if it's not too bold for random new girl to ask?

[dead_tongue]

Hot? Yeah. But check this out...

[Tilting his head back so the scar that runs all around his neck is visible.] Gross, right?

Oh, well, okay, I sort of summoned my soul mate by ripping off Practical Magic with one of my besties! And now I'm also seeing said bestie's ex. Which I should probably discuss with him.

[unfazeable]

[her eyes do get rounder with the sight of the scar. the full loop. all the way around this one's neck.]

Is Practical Magic related to the fact you look like you had your head taken clean off? None of these fellas—fellas, right? [surely she has a gaydar.] —were the ones went at your neck with magic, were they?

[dead_tongue]

Oh, no, when I said my own weird shit I meant romantically. My boyfriend and my other guy are super nice! ...a little antisocial, but nice.

I did get my head taken off! After I was dead, though. The first time I died I got attacked by zombies. That was really scary.

[He sounds pleasant enough about it.]

[unfazeable]

Ah. So you died the first time in a different world, then?

[valiant attempt to make sense of this narrative. and she thought bob was being weird about the avengers.]

Antisocial refers to violent and law-breaking conduct. Asocial means they just like to be on their own. Which one did you mean?

[dead_tongue]

Nope. Still here. It can happen multiple times.

I know it sounds nuts.

[He has to absorb that info.]

Ohhhh. Really? Uh, the second one then. Finch lived in the shrubs for like a month.

[unfazeable]

[being decapitated after death, versus living in the shrubs for a month. which one sounds more nuts. hard to say.]

Congratulations on not dating a psychopath.

[something you always have to look out for, in her circles.] That's a bird's name, you know. 'Finch.' What's he like when he's not doing that?

[dead_tongue]

Thanks!

[He beams.] I know. It's cute, though. The bird and his name both.

Oh, he's fantastic. Just really thoughtful and really kind... and funny. Frequently by accident!