fuck marry kill

[money]

FUCK, MARRY, KILL

welcome to GAME NIGHT at DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES. the game on the docket? FUCK, MARRY, KILL. the rules are simple: roll the game picker wheel three times or just pick three as you'd like, dropping the names in your header comment — icly we'll say they picked they names out of a hat. people respond, comment around, get into fist fights, kiss a little? thread hop and react as you see fit!
(meme threads can be considered canon!)

Comments

saber tooth – original

[masticated]

[big bad man coming in hot with his big lazy tiger. after downing a shot and slamming the glass on the table:]

Let's go! Fuck, marry, kill: Grace, Embry, me.

[buio]

Kill you.

[masticated]

Hot. How you gonna do it, sweetheart?

[buio]

Dunno, I heard you're hard to kill. Got any tips?

[masticated]

Been here long enough to come up with ideas on your own and you want me to hand it to ya? I don't think so. [waving some waitstaff over for a second round of shots: vodka. one glass is nudged to ptolemais.] Let's get creative, hm? Your turn. Every shot you take I'll tell you somethin'.

We'll see if you still wanna kill me by the time we're done.

[homosexuals]

Marry Grace, fuck Embry, kill you.

Obviously.

[masticated]

You were a wolf too, asshole. [lighting a cigarette purely to blow it in hawk's face.] I'll kill you back.

[homosexuals]

[without missing a beat, hawk nabs the cigarette, sucking it hard enough to hollow his cheeks suggestively.]

You suddenly interested in sucking cock? I must have missed a few chapters.

[homophobia is dead?]

[masticated]

[gay insinuation right in front of his face?]

Say that again and I'll cut your fuckin' tongue out.

[nightsung]

If anyone willingly marries you I’ll dye my hair pink.

[masticated]

I don't wanna get married, but I'd like to see your hair pink.

[nightsung]

I guess you’ll just have to use your imagination.

[macrosmatic]

You just had to include yourself.

[masticated]

Can't be doin' worse than Embry. C'mon, play the game. You gonna pick me?

[macrosmatic]

Well, I can't say I want to marry you, but I don't particularly want to kill you, either, so... [ y'know ]

I like Grace, so I'd marry her.

[haggle]

Woodchipper special for your ass. Woulda said firing squad for Embry, but the bullets might get hurt. Gotta make it poetic and feed him to fucking dogs, I guess. ( :) ) And a ring on it for Grace, fucking obviously.

[masticated]

You always gotta make it special for me, huh, Ani?

[big smile :)]

You wanna feed him to my tiger?

[haggle]

Yeah. Real touching death for someone who's touched in the head.

( a twist of her nose. hashing out saber's murder fantasies is a daily routine — as numbered and normal as changing her sweaty thongs, one for every day of the week. the real offense is: )

Ew. No, bitch. I'm not feeding him Embry's rye-bread ass. That shit's animal abuse.

[revvedup]

Marry Grace if she’ll have me.

[ she knows better than to piss off the boss and the vibes are off with embry anyway. ]

You buying me a drink first if I say I’d fuck you?

[masticated]

Grace is a fine, fine choice. [and would likely have her.] Yeah, I'll buy you a drink. Only if you really wanna fuck me, though. I bet you do. Everybody wants a taste of the guy who's died twice, but I'll tell you one thing: I want a taste of you more.

[revvedup]

[ this guy really goes from 0 to 100 ]

Just the two, huh? Not so sure anymore.

[temporicide]

Which answer permutation lets me pet your new kitty?

[masticated]

Roza, you can pet him whenever you want. You get special treatment.

[femicide]

You were not underselling yourself, tiger.

[ regarding his unpopularity. ]

Is it very lonesome, down in the grave? I imagine you get visitors of a certain kind.

[ pissing on his plot, probably. ]

[masticated]

People love to hate me.

[an exaggerated shrug. what did she expect?]

Why, you wanna know what death feels like? It's quiet.