fuck marry kill

[money]

FUCK, MARRY, KILL

welcome to GAME NIGHT at DEAD MEN TELL NO TALES. the game on the docket? FUCK, MARRY, KILL. the rules are simple: roll the game picker wheel three times or just pick three as you'd like, dropping the names in your header comment — icly we'll say they picked they names out of a hat. people respond, comment around, get into fist fights, kiss a little? thread hop and react as you see fit!
(meme threads can be considered canon!)

Comments

Ava Starr (Ghost) | Marvel Cinematic Universe (Thunderbolts)

[unfazeable]

All right, shit. Umm. What's... Am I pronouncing this right—Ptolemais?

Bob. I know that one. You get a lot of action for something left in the oven. [she doesn't know the half of it, and that's given she is already aware of holegate five fucking minutes ago.]

And Murphy.

[sensive]

[ help!!!! ]

I really don’t — it’s not really. Like that. I don’t know what the hole post was about. I’ve never met that guy.

[unfazeable]

I'm not sure what 'like that' is like. Did spend most of my life in a lab prison, you might have heard.

This mean your reputation precedes you?

[sensive]

C’mon.

[ never have i ever shown hole (on the network) ]

I have, but I know you know. I mean, you know what I mean — unless. You’re, uh, teasing me? [ big smile. ] Because we’re friends.

[ 🥰 ]

[unfazeable]

Don't think it's a requirement, but yes. I'm teasing you.

[nothing on the friends bit. takes more than that. her smile is not as wide, but it exists.]

You don't like being popular?

[sensive]

[ on the road to friends! ]

I seem more popular than I am. That’s all. You got a skewed sample size ‘cause someone put my name in this hat extra.

[ why the hell else does he keep coming up. ]

[buio]

'Ptolemais'.

(Toll-ah-my-us.)

[unfazeable]

Striking. [no dig in her tone.]

Are you the one from New Zealand? Superior Marmite and all?

[buio]

What gave it away. (That's a joke... she's aware of her own accent.)

Where are you from?

[unfazeable]

The States. By way of Argentina, when I was a child. But my parents were from England.

[her accent is probably a choice, at this point, but she's not going to dump all that out in absence of a mind-controlling portrait hall.]

If you know the Avengers, I almost died with them once.

[buio]

Cool. I haven't been to any of those places but I'd like to go to Argentina. (Presumably, here, they are already in the UK? No comment on the States.)

I don't. Are they a... cult or something?

[dead_tongue]

I have to marry Ptolemais but it will be a sham marriage. Sex with Bobert. Murphy sorta looks like he'd steal your switch and hawk it without asking? So he has to go.

not here

[wrackful]

[Iggy hating him in every universe, even when he doesn't know him: unsurprising.]

not here

[dead_tongue]

[it is not his fault you have sussy bf vibes]

not here

[wrackful]

[it's not his fault his sussy bf vibes are somehow the only ones you're not magnetically attracted to!!!]

not here

[dead_tongue]

[this is true. how is he immune? science needs to get on that.]

[buio]

You'd make a great sham husband.

[dead_tongue]

Right?! I'd be like oh this is my GORGEY gorgey wife, we have an open marriage wink wink.

[buio]

(If you see instant regret pass over Ptolemais's face no you didn't)

Okay never mind.

[dead_tongue]

Is that not how sham husbandry works? Because if you married me for my culinary skills you're gonna be sorely disappointed.

[unfazeable]

Seems unfair. Is there a fellow with a strong nose who you'd give permission to hawk your watch, after he stole it?

This is not a real objection. Don't know Murphy. Have been informed he can cook, though. Literally.

[dead_tongue]

Uhmm... maybe that Kovacs guy 'cause he's so hot I'd forgive anything.

Oooh, really? Hm. But Bob's too nice to kill! He saved me from a moth.

[unfazeable]

Yeah. I'll grant you, Bob does have that going for him. It's unrelenting.

[so nice it wraps around into being awful, if she's choosing to be difficult about it.]

'Kovacs guy?' I'm new. Have you got a picture?

[hislittleflower]

Kill Bob, sorry Bob. He seems sweet but not for me.

Marry Murphy - he's a shocking good chef and I enjoy eating baked goods.

Marrying Ptolemais seems the least objectionable.

[unfazeable]

Ptolemais has strong opinions on Marmite, if you're picky about food. Not sure which direction you'd go on that one, but I doubt it'd make for good sweets.

Did you leave out the fucking just because you're only keen on romance and murder? Or are we brainstorming? Some people seem to enjoy mixing up food and sex.